I stayed home last night. It was planned, I needed a day to catch up, to breathe, to light a fire in the fireplace, have nothing or no one to keep up with or keep tabs on or owe any time, sweat or attention to... I watched a couple of movies, I read for awhile, the kids were in and out all night, visiting with friends, having some friends over, but me, the living room, the fireplace and the TV were kind of off limits... I just wanted to have time to think, to be, to watch out the window, to stare blankly into space, to enjoy not having to go anywhere or be anywhere or to have to do anything... to snooze for a bit, to have a very minimal presence on the computer... I said a couple of hello's and for the most part, the extent of my computer presence was sending the above picture from my phone to my e-mail and then saving the pic to my hard drive...
Every so often, not often enough, I take one day for me. I spend so much time indulging in my kids, who deserve it, my job, which doesn't - but I am committed to them and so I owe them my best, to four or five volunteer outfits which I truly love, and the efforts that I give them are truly labors of love, so they don't really take from me, as much as they give me energy and joy and much more than they take from me... But to have the opportunity to light the fire in the fireplace, and take some time to myself, once in a great while, is truly a blessing.
It's not all self-indulgence. I do inventory. What have I done well, what needs more work, what deserves more of my time, where would I like to devote more of my time... I give thanks for gestures of kindness and thoughtfulness - that takes some time because I truly, truly have been blessed in so many ways, by so many gracious, kind, generous friends, neighbors and family. I often am reminded of Thornton Wilder's truly insightful quote:
"We can only be said to be alive in those moments when our hearts are conscious of our treasures."
Thank you for all that you have brought to my world, to my life... this 2011. My heart is full, not conscious of all my treasures as they seem too numerous to fully focus upon, but be it known by these presents, I am blessed, beyond measure. May 2012 be of a similar nature for you, in all regards.
My dearest and most favorite Mr. Tom... There is nothing I can say of which you are not aware in regards to how much I treasure you. Reading this, made me, once again, smile as I am glad to have been a small part of your time at your fire place ;-) May your 2012 be a fantastic year, one with all the joys imaginable;, one with all the love you desire; one of great health and one filled with all the people by whom you want to be surrounded. And may you allow me to remain within that circle of people. tons of hugs and kisses and all that fun stuff.... HAPPY NEW YEAR :-)
ReplyDeleteLiane - I treasure you, thank you.
ReplyDelete