More from my favorite place...

The sun setting over the Bay of Green Bay, just about the same time that Whitney Houston was leaving this earthly existence. Feb. 11, 2012

Look how I strike fear into this tiny winged creature... 02/12/2012

This little guy thought I was the gravy train... the birds just flocked around me in the hopes that I was going to fill the bird feeder. 02/12/2012

Waiting patiently for me to get the food out... 02/12/2012

Walking up to the Eagle Bluff Lighthouse, over looking the Bay of Green Bay 02/12/2012

Looking out into the Bay, pondering how desolate this spot must have been 100 years ago, when a family lived here and the lighthouse served the shipping industry of the Great Lakes 02/12/2012

Just a few of the snippets from Peninsula State Park, near Fish Creek, WI 02/12/2012

48 hours of battery charging

We Cheeseheads are proud people. We love our home state, brag it up continually, will run, not walk but run to get in front of a TV if we hear the state name or a locality located within it mentioned on a national network or forum of some such... Wisconsin has a lot to be proud of, I love it here, though at times it can sound like a love/hate relationship... it has four seasons, and at times it can feel like we merely have road construction, winter and August 15, we really, really do have changing weather patterns and a lot of variety, and yes... extremes.

Today's Cheesehead travelogue finds us in Door County, the peninsula located on the extreme eastern side of the state, the thumb jutting out into Lake Michigan. It's about 75 miles or so north of here, and this past weekend, some buddies and I ventured there to just get away... sample some local flavor, quaff some fermented malted beverages, breathe in some fresh air and do whatever we wanted.

I was successful. The guys were too happy to sit indoors or vegetate in the whirlpool for too long at a time, but hey, it was their time, they spent their money to get there, and they were welcome to do whatever it was that meant time off/time away to them. I had to commune with my favorite honey, Mother Nature. The picture above is of the sun setting on Saturday, as I drove up there... it was breathtaking - the stark, cold, forbidding ice swallowed up and dragged the sun out of the sky... leaving gathering darkness and damp, chilled-to-the-bone cold behind...

On one of my sojourns, I went into Peninsula State Park and did some hiking. The sun shone so brightly, the quiet was absolutely stunning, and yet at times the air was so alive with life - the breeze, the birds, with Ma Nature telling her stories of storms, of knocking over trees, of vigilant hawks, nosy racoons and hungry bunnies, squirrels and birds... Case in point, that chickadee who figured since I was a human, I must be the guy who fills up the bird feeders, right? They were hungry, and all I could do was make a mental note that next time I come up, stop at the bird food store just outside of Sturgeon Bay and get some feed for the feathered dudes and dudettes...Chickadees and martins and sparrows, landing on my head, my shoulders, my arms... waiting for a handout...

This picture is a view to the northwest of some islands located in the Bay of Green Bay (the body of water betwixt the Door Peninsula and the mainland state of Wisconsin). It just looked so stark and desolate... and breathtaking. The artist who was doing this artwork was truly inspired... the way the ice breaks up and is pushed toward shore, to reform, refreeze and then break up again, and then to get lightly or heavily sprinkled with snow... I stood on this bluff and almost felt the need to kneel in the silence, the power and majesty of the view seemed to require some show of reverence...

Here I am gazing out into the clear blue of Lake Michigan, pondering how it was to live in a lighthouse back 100 years ago or so. To my right, not pictured, is Eagle Bluff Lighthouse. Various men and their families lived here, on this site, in the lighthouse, to aid in navigation of the Great Lakes. A young man of 18 lost his life, in full view of this lighthouse, walking from the island, visible in the background, to Fish Creek, which would be a few miles to the east (right) of where I stand. He was walking to Fish Creek to get the mail, and fell through the ice. The man standing watch in the Eagle Bluff Lighthouse watched helplessly as the accident happened a half mile or more out from this point. By the time help arrived, they had to begin search operations. Eventually they found him and he is buried a few miles away in a local cemetery.

Such harsh reality. I stood in complete silence and pondered how past generations probably just accepted the fact that the elements were going to win sometimes. The lighthouse is no longer manned, it is a historical site. And a memorial.

On the last leg of my journey on Sunday, I bid the sun adieu once again... and was enveloped by the cold again.

Pictures don't do justice. Well, for me they do. I get to ignite those memories, and to feel all those feelings, listen to the snow crunch as I made my way up the road to the lighthouse. A two mile walk slightly uphill, as the park closes the road to the lighthouse in the winter. Closes it to vehicles, but welcomes those of us willing to invest an hour or two in fresh air and being serenaded by nature's songbook.

I have spent many a lovely day in Door County. I will forever make a point of going there to visit... in any season. So many good memories, so much treasure for the senses. Part of my Wisconsin. Part of our Wisconsin. I love bikini weather, sunshine, warm salt air, and listening to an ocean... but, listening to nothing, and puffing up my lungs with frigid air, and being just for the sake of being has its place too.

God Bless Us Everyone...

I stayed home last night. It was planned, I needed a day to catch up, to breathe, to light a fire in the fireplace, have nothing or no one to keep up with or keep tabs on or owe any time, sweat or attention to... I watched a couple of movies, I read for awhile, the kids were in and out all night, visiting with friends, having some friends over, but me, the living room, the fireplace and the TV were kind of off limits... I just wanted to have time to think, to be, to watch out the window, to stare blankly into space, to enjoy not having to go anywhere or be anywhere or to have to do anything... to snooze for a bit, to have a very minimal presence on the computer... I said a couple of hello's and for the most part, the extent of my computer presence was sending the above picture from my phone to my e-mail and then saving the pic to my hard drive...

Every so often, not often enough, I take one day for me. I spend so much time indulging in my kids, who deserve it, my job, which doesn't - but I am committed to them and so I owe them my best, to four or five volunteer outfits which I truly love, and the efforts that I give them are truly labors of love, so they don't really take from me, as much as they give me energy and joy and much more than they take from me... But to have the opportunity to light the fire in the fireplace, and take some time to myself, once in a great while, is truly a blessing.

It's not all self-indulgence. I do inventory. What have I done well, what needs more work, what deserves more of my time, where would I like to devote more of my time... I give thanks for gestures of kindness and thoughtfulness - that takes some time because I truly, truly have been blessed in so many ways, by so many gracious, kind, generous friends, neighbors and family. I often am reminded of Thornton Wilder's truly insightful quote:

"We can only be said to be alive in those moments when our hearts are conscious of our treasures."

Thank you for all that you have brought to my world, to my life... this 2011. My heart is full, not conscious of all my treasures as they seem too numerous to fully focus upon, but be it known by these presents, I am blessed, beyond measure. May 2012 be of a similar nature for you, in all regards.

One of the reasons that I like it here

Hi there intrepid troupers... lovers of the written word, friends, acquaintances and dilly dallyers of the of the blogosphere... I always talk rather glowingly of how much I love where I live. I do. Nature abounds, fresh air, lots of space, plenty of work, but that is not a bad thing. Here are a few snapshots from off of my deck, this Friday past. I get lots of deer around here, rarely a buck. This one was helping himself to the apples that fall off my apple tree. I throw them in a dead spot on the edge of my property - the apples are not very good to eat, human wise, the deer like them just fine. They recycle them back into my lawn, it's all good - definitely a circle of life thing... He was eating his fill, in no particular hurry. He seemed so at ease - now this is last Friday, day 6 of the open gun hunting season for white tailed deer in Wisconsin. When he left, as he is shown doing in the bottom photo - he ran around the baseball field adjacent to my land, and out into the nature preserve - almost as if he knew that he was safe there - no hunting is allowed there or in the county park that is adjacent to that. We watched each other with about the same interest. I was so glad that he came to visit, and I trust that he was happy that I only shot him with a camera.

If...

I love "if" statements. I should've been a debater, as I can passionately argue things from multiple perspectives... though don't mistake that as not having any convictions, or not being passionate about my beliefs. I have a considerable amount of empathy, so I can see the sense of what someone may be arguing, even if I oppose it. "If if's and but's were candy and nuts, we'd have Christmas time all year..." one of my most favorite of if statements...

If you want to hire someone to sing the National Anthem, hire a country singer, they seem to love it like no other genre of singers out there, they own it when they belt it out... though for my money, the gold standard of National Anthems of all time, Ms. Whitney Houston singing before the 1991 Super Bowl (I believe the Cowboys clobbered the Bills in that one...) - she gave just a stunning, awesome performance. It was during or very near the time of the First Gulf War, so there was a fighter jet flyover, man - if that doesn't give you goosebumps, you must be dead... If I could, I would write more often... or more correctly, if I felt that I could have 30-45 minutes of unmolested time every day, I would do this more often. So many of you people are so awesomely talented, and I love to come by and visit and do my drive by comments, many times, I don't even contribute to the thread that is going because I haven't read them all... But I do, really, love to read what many of you write, and it does my mind and body good to share your laughs and give my gray matter some aerobic exercise...I don't write more because I feel it has to be perfect, which is stupid, right? I need to care less to write more, but the kicker there is that I need to really care about something to write about it...

If he were still with us, and God how I wish he were, my dog Eddie would be 26 today. I had an Eddie before Frasier did... though I called him Ed. My buddy, the beagle/springer spaniel mix, was just the best boy, had a sweet disposition and loved people. He was always the lead singer at noon on Saturday's, when they tested the county's emergency sirens. Once he started in, the whole neighborhood canine choir joined in... was always pretty funny. Rest in peace, my nice boy...

If we ever get tired of trying to idiot proof everything, maybe we could make our economy go some... Every jar has to have a tamper proof lid, everything you buy has set of instructions longer than the Bible.... The problem is that the stupid people are not deterred, us other ones (not always the smart ones...) end up getting pissed off and ready to quit. If I had any sense, I'd be in bed right now...

Sit with Me

Whenever I see two chairs arrayed like this, it always makes me ponder. Were they put there together, by just one person, who was awaiting the arrival of someone else? That would be a thing to consider - did the other person show up, did they actually use both chairs, or was one enough? What did they discuss in the chairs? Did the discussion lead to the chairs being now empty?

Sit with me, and let us lose ourselves to the world. Let's exercise our visual skills, and completely scan and analyze the horizon and everything above it and below it. Let me take your hand and study it, memorize it, taste it... we have time that is limitless and a schedule that we have vacated for the purposes of replenishing ourselves with each other... waste not a minute of it, but hurry through none of it as well. Sit with me, oh, sit with me...

'Cause if you want love
We'll make it
Swimming a deep sea
Of blankets
Take all your big plans
And break 'em
This is bound to be a while (J. Mayer, Your Body is a Wonderland)

If we should choose to just sit there, and know that the other is there, and share the same oxygen for awhile, maybe digitally exploring or doing some superficial reconnisance... I could be quite entertained by such proceedings, and become a source of entertainment as well. We can talk about anything, endlessly, or nothing for just as long and know that either is acceptable... I want to be anything and everything, but mostly I want to be here, with you...

The smile on your face let's me know that you need me
There's a truth in your eyes saying you'll never leave me
The touch of your hand says you'll catch me wherever I fall
You say it best, when you say nothing at all (R. Keating, When You Say Nothing at All)

And should our present togetherness lead to more pleasant togetherness, well, I should say that I would love that as well, and make sure that whatever our togetherness yields, my every effort and desire would be that it be lovely, and lingering, and lascivious, and luscious... let me ponder all the things that could be perpetrated, and repeatedly so, until we feel that efforts at perfection are no longer necessary... Let us brook the small distance betwixt us, and gaze upon heaven from the comfort of this chair, or your chair, and know that streaking through the constellation can be accomplished right here, right now... but remember, streaking is not accomplished with clothes on...

The possibilities of what two can accomplish, of the promise that the two chairs offer, of the many facets and features of what can be launched from this time and place. The clock can be switched off. There is no agenda, well, except more... I want more, and then some. Dehydration is the only acceptable limit to what we can accomplish. And there are remedies for that. Let us go forth into that realm where two chairs scream of redundancy. Two chairs are necessary as a starting point, for the run up to the inevitable. I love that you would sit beside me, and then find that not close enough...

And then every time that we see two chairs, they will stand as monuments to the love that we made, blessed icons that remind of us of the lovely worship that took place. Yes, some of it was upon the knees, as chairs definitely invite that type of worship. And worship that invoked loud proclamations of praise and gesturing to the heavens... I love that you want to share that message of joy and fulfillment with anyone and everyone within earshot. I promise to do the same.

Thank you chairs, for marking off this spot in the cosmos. Here we started, here we left the oneness behind and harvested two-getherness. You have become more than furniture, far beyond what is a resting place. You have cordoned us off for each other, and announced to the world that this place is ours, we each to the other, for now, for always... when the two of us are gone and the memories are carried along in windswept halls, cleaving to every atom where any decibel landed forth... this place was ours. Each grain of sand can bear witness to the goodness of what was shared. And it was good, very good.

sometimes it just fits...

Addicted
Ronan Keating

Just one more kiss
And I’ll be gone
I won’t write, I won’t call you
No more girl, I swear that I’ll be strong
Just one more taste of you
And I’ll be fine
Girl I mean what I say today
But tomorrow I’ll know that I was lying

Cos baby, oh
I only wish you knew
How this feeling scares me so
It’s just like letting, just like letting go

And I guess is that’s addiction
Then I guess that I’m addicted
And I guess that I’m your junkie, fair enough
(I’m your junkie)
And I guess if that’s addiction
Then I guess that I’m your junkie
And I guess that I’m just strung out on your love

Girl I can’t sleep
In these wet sheets
Cos I’ve got hot flushes, cold sweats
And a hunger that’s making me weak

So hit me up
With your best stuff
All I need is a bag of attention
And maybe an ounce of your trust

Cos letting go
Is harder than you know
I’m tearing out my heart
To give my heart to you
As you walk right out of view

Chorus

You go through my heart and through my soul
Like a river gone out of control
It takes my resolve and washes it all away

Chorus

Don’t walk away
I’m addicted

Sometimes, this is the river in which I am bobbing around in... the thoughts, the memories, the scent, the close my eyes so hard feeling that you are right here... like a river gone out of control. I feel it so strongly, and want with every small gesture, with every thought, try to let you know how I feel. And whatever I do, in so many ways feels to be too much on one hand, and nowhere near enough on the other... To want in such a way that causes weakness, mute, sobbing silence... I wish you knew that my only desire is for you to think of me and smile. I do not want some elusive cosmic forever... but just to matter to you.